Sep. 30th, 2009 01:34 am
wsdante: (Ho Hum)

Really quite weary the last couple of days as I recuperate from a bout of Man-Flu, (Courtesy of Bin, methinks. Thanks, pal).

This was exacerbated by a couple of days of C & me growling at each other. I've been under the weather; she's been stressed out. As usual, I can't even remember what kicked it off.

I'm planning to pack in the baccy. 35 years of smoking is going to end this year.

Yes: 35 yrs.

(At least no one can accuse me of lacking the ability to commit).

Now, I just have to un-commit. I have the outline of a game plan already and the number for the local quitters support people. I am cultivating a strong image in my mind of a smug tobacco company exec farting around in his merc while I pay him for the pleasure of slowly losing lung capacity.
Spoke to my doc about it and he told me he it would be best to check in with him every couple of weeks to begin with as there's a chance it may make the M.E. worse for the first few weeks. Typical...  

It rather defies logic that attempting NOT to do something should be so difficult. Surely inaction ought to be easier than actually having to consciously DO a thing. Just don't do it, right? To make the effort or not to make the effort; which is easier?
Yet while I'm picturing the smug exec and focussing on the benefits of NOT bothering to do something, I look down a cig has magically appeared in my hand. What's that all about? Must try harder. 

Anyway, here's to venturing nothing in order to achieve something.

For the record, this decision is entirely for my own reasons and not the least influenced by the nanny state-sponsored and cowardly persecution of smokers currently in force in our fair(?) land.
(Maybe next time they'll have the balls to go for drinkers. Statistically, they cause more death and misery than smokers ever did). 

p.s. I hereby give permission to anyone reading this to kick me up the arse (Bishop Brennan-stylee) if I become one of those poacher-turned-gamekeeper, smug, fat, lecturing, patronising evangelical ex-smokers. 
You can even shout, "No-one likes a quitter!" at me.

wsdante: (Default)

Feeling guilty about being so lazy with the journal that I've simply spent the last several entries piffling around with the Writers' Block thing.

Well - the M.E. allows me some leeway on the laziness front, I suppose. No excuse for not thinking for myself, tho' :(

So, what's been happening chez Nidge then?

I turned 45 on the 21st of this month - never thought I'd get this far chronologically, tbh. 
Strangely, a significant number of my cards were of a somewhat scatological theme... hmm.

On the 23rd, C and I celebrated another anniversary and let's just say there are no regrets here in the least - some surprise that she's put up with me this far - but no regrets at all.  I am a lucky, lucky, old curmudgeon.

Check: (Romeo and Juliet
, Act I, Scene V, [52-57])

Or: Rush - Madrigal

Tom is on his walkabout and currently in the Peterborough area. Despite initial blisters, he and cousin Ethan seem to be enjoying it all.

Daisy had her delayed 5th birthday party on Sunday 19th and a good time was had by all. As the official face-painter I faced such challenging requests as "Hotdog" and "Mermaid" but these imaginative requests broke the "Butterfly" trend up nicely.

M.E.-wise, the good news is that my legs seem stronger and are giving me less of the pain-then-numbness cycle than usual. On the downside, the fatigue is getting bad, especially when coupled with bouts of being so mentally wired a good deal of the time.
I've run out of Amytriptyline and failed to request a repeat prescription hoping to get by with just the Propanalol & etc.

I'm thinking that might have been a mistake...

I need to get my shit together as I'm planning a surprise for C on her birthday (23rd Sep). I can't say here what it is in case she reads this post but it will take some time and effort to sort out. Those whose curiosity gets the better of them can drop me an email for further details. (Not YOU, Candia!)

wsdante: (Default)
Today the M.E. has me completely bolloxed. Temp is way up, my mind is wizzing around - but so fast it never settles anywhere, I'm at that wimpering softly to myself stage of dog-tiredness and, (if it makes any sense), my muscles feel too short. 

I wonder what brought that on...?


wsdante: (Default)

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